Being Afro in a Straight World: Detoxing the 'creamy crack'

September of 2005 I learned I was pregnant and figured since I was going to be going through a ton of new physical changes I might as well throw my hair in the mix as well.  Not sure if this was the best plan, but it was the plan I chose.

At the time my hair was damaged from relaxers. The back of my hair was breaking off and falling out and the rest looked very thin….. I started to research on how to go natural and learned that I needed to start with as much new growth as possible (hair that was not relaxed). I had just had a relaxer or, taken a shot of the creamy crack, so I was starting at the very beginning.  Within 6 weeks I had my first bit of kinky new growth. I started to try new things such as braiding my hair in cornrows and then taking it out for a 1980’s crimp look… as seen in the picture to the left.  My mother has been so diligent over the years to braid my hair so the first several times I had her put in my cornrows… but I knew I would eventually have to learn.  

In the picture below I did them myself!!!  I added hair in to my cornrows so that I could braid through the ends and crimp those as well. Even though i do not do this anymore I am very glad I took the time to learn how to braid a cornrow!!

I wore this style for a bit while I was growing out my relaxer. But then Debbie Gibson called and asked for her hair back so I moved on….

Well… kinda..

I discovered the ‘Fall’ or the ‘Half Wig’ or simply put a hair piece.  I am pretty sure I still have one of these synthetic concoctions stored some where in my hair closet… What this is, is a hairpiece with combs on the interior at the front and the back. The idea is that you clip this on about 2-3inches from the front of your hairline. So the big deal is making sure that transition from your hair to the wig hair is seamless. In this picture I am about 4-5months pregnant so it must be Januaryish of 2006. 

By now, I have about 5 months of grow out and was determined to stay the course.

Meanwhile, I am daily being challenged with ingrained images of what I think beautiful is, and slightly depressed because I know that I do not measure up….

I also needed to address these buried emotions of acknowledging the fact that I am a black female..... and what that meant to ME.